Zombieland

Rated: R  Directed by: Ruben Fleischer  Written by: Rhett Reese and Paul Wernick

Starring: Jesse Eisenberg, Woody Harrelson, Emma Stone, Abigail Breslin

Movie type: Zombie / Comedy / Action

(4.5 Undead)

For many of us fascinated with the inevitable zombie uprising within our lifetimes, movies have fallen short of illustrating how well prepared we are for the walking dead. Finally, a movie covers those of us  who are not only ready for the zombie apocalypse, but gleefully awaiting it, baseball bats and hunting knives in hand. We have our plans. We have our rules. Many of us even know where we’ll go and who we’ll take with us. When the dead rise up, the nerds will be waiting.

Zombieland’s hero ‘Columbus’ may not have been waiting and hoping for a plague of zombies, but he still proves better fitted for it than most. His personal observations on what makes him more fit for a world post-zombie will ring true for many a giddy geek viewer, even if not always for the reasons the audience would like. While he may not be built for combat, Columbus (Jesse Eisenberg) is quick (Cardio) and clever (Know your way out). His survival speaks to the value of paranoia while Tallahassee (Woody Harrelson) survives more through blind rage and brute force and the girls they meet along the way (Emma Stone and Abigail Breslin as Wichita and Little Rock) make their way through Zombieland through cunning alone.

Without giving away any of the plot, which is simple but perfect, I will instead focus on what’s important: Zombie kills. While many kills take place off screen or simply are not dwelt upon, those which are shown are wonderful. The zombies themselves are brainless, hungry, and horrific as they should be. Every one of them is leaking either some sort of vomitous sludge or thick black ichor from their mouths and are largely the slow moving sort that purists prefer. As an old school zombie fan, I like my zombies slow, dumb, and relentless and Zombieland delivers. The undead are then dispatched with everything from the old-stand-by of shotguns to creative weapons like hedge trimmers and banjos.

When the zombies come –and they will– it will be a no win situation. Zombieland stands as a testament to making the best of a bad situation. Just because everyone around you is a member of the walking dead doesn’t mean you need to let it get you down. Choose your weapon, watch your back, and aim for the head.